Dale Carnegie wrote a fantastic book back in 1936 that really spelled out How to Win Friends and Influence People, and in my view it was so successful, and continues to be successful, because it contains such a lot of common sense about treating others how we ourselves like to be treated.

Unfortunately, we sometimes forget our common sense due to work and other pressures, and times have changed a little too, so I have put together a quick list with a few examples of both ‘old’ and modern day areas to focus on to leave a lasting impression and be remembered for the right reasons.

1) Pay someone a compliment

If there is a genuine reason to pay someone a compliment, make their day and tell them. The person wearing a great shirt or a nice perfume will always appreciate a positive compliment, and that compliment will stay with them all day. I wear the best shoes I can afford and they get noticed, very often making the topic of conversation.

2) Say thanks often

Show your appreciation by saying “thanks” when someone holds the door open for you, or goes out of their way to do something. When did you last thank your partner for being awesome or your staff for doing a great job? Appreciation is one of the main drivers for someone staying committed in a relationship or job; don’t forget to tell them.

3) Give generously

If you are not the type to get stuck in when manual labour is needed, how else can you give generously? A fellow Rotarian, who didn’t have the time for the physical work, gave his expertise generously instead, allowing the club and other charities to benefit from his experience and knowledge.

4) Do what you say you will

Don’t let others think badly of you by not doing what you said you will, even the smallest of things. Someone may well be relying on you.

5) Smile

I am a big believer in this. The chap that held the door open for me with a beaming smile made me feel like a princess. How can you pass on such great feelings to others to make their day?

6) Use their name

What was the name of the barista that made your coffee this morning? Next time you order, thank them as usual and follow up with their name, it will be noticed. Using their name really is Dale Carnegie 101: “The single sweetest sound in any language is a person’s name”.

7) Follow up

The drain layer that came to give me a quote didn’t follow up until two months after he visited. Needless to say, someone else did the job and he lost out. Do you follow up 100 per cent of the time in a timely manner, before your competitor gets in? You will stand out just by following up every time, because so few people do it.

Build exciting relationships, online and off.


Linda Coles is a conference speaker and author on building relationships.

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